I have been raised in the LDS faith and have a strong belief in it's teachings and believe that this knowledge is the only thing that has allowed me to deal with these experiences.

I have all my life suffered from insomnia. As a young child I learned to play quietly in my room so Mum could sleep. I also suffered from extremely lucid dreams to the point where I often asked mum if I was awake or dreaming. Also there were many times when the contents of my dreams would latter occur in real life.

As I got older I stopped being able to remember them save once in a blue moon. I haver began to have more incidents where my body was totally asleep and unable to move yet my mind remained awake. When my family scoffed at my claim of such I made sure to remember every word spoken the next time I was in this state which I them repeated back to them upon waking, so say the were distressed by this would be putting it mildly.

Than in my senior year of high school I was laying in bed in just such a state of waking sleep when I cast my gaze towards the open closet across the room. Now as I can not sleep when there is light in my eyes and sometime not even when it is in the room at all I had shut my door and turned my rather bright alarm clock so that is shown into the closet from a shelf directly by it. There in the slightly illuminated opening stood what I can only describe as a shadow person. A person that I directly identified as male.

I was not only a good girl but a late bloomer and had therefor knew that male persons were not allowed in my room, specifically if the door was closed and not if I am sleeping. At the same time I knew that this male was not human, well not a flesh and blood human and that I should not allow him to remain. I knew in this state that I could not move or speak from previous expierence and without even thinking about it looked directly at him and though the words that were required.

The moment that I thought them such a wave of animosity was directed at me from this male that even as he was forcefully expelled from the room I sat directly up in bed and had backed into the corner furthered from him. My hart which had been calm was racing and it took me hours to to calm myself enough to actually sleep.

I know this was not simply a nightmare, I have only ever remembered one nightmare many years before this and involving Lady Elane from Mr Rodgers Neighborhood. Recently while driving to work and listening to the Coast To Coat AM program a caller spoke of an incident involving the Shadow People as they are apparently called that boor such a resemblance to this expearances that in spite of not having thought of it in over half a decade sent chills up my spine and is thus why I am now righting this.

Date:	2007-01-13 20:51
Subject:	On Jamies Dreams & Franks Ghost Sighting
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper
Music:	Lord of the Rings

Diana Gabaldon Outlander Series
Posted in response to Jades queary about Jamie's dream & the Ghost Frank sees in O.

I think its called soul walking but don’t quote me on that. [Please note that I am recalling information learned long ago in High school before I knew to keep track of my sources however you can Google the phrase to find most of it.]

The basic concept it that when one enters a cretin realm of mental activity and spiritual knowledge of oneself that there soul can become separated from the body and ‘wonder’ where the flesh can not. This state can be entered accidentally or purposely. Most often this state is achieved through meditation and Labyrinth gardens were created to help promote a similar state however it can also be reached by some people during the sleep process and in dreams.

Time, place & even the physical presence of some one would not stand as a hindrance to the walker.

This wondering usually occurs on only the mental level allowing them to see that which is occurring. Some times a wonder can take possession of another soul walker’s empty body for a period of time and some body’s are more susceptible to this sort of invasion than other; one who acts as a medium actively seeks this type of poison. But occasionally the wonder can assume its own solid or semisolid form while away from there body. Please note that such a form is not an actual body and therefore not subject to the physical forces of nature sounding it that would affect a physical body (“The wind was cutting up like billy-o, but his drapes—his kilts and his plaid, you know—they didn’t move at all…”).

The natural ability to be a soul walker usually runs in families that boast sears (such as Jennie) and the walker can usually develop a strong connection with some one they feel strongly for even if the other person is not a walker themselves.

Now on the off chance that Jamie is a soul walker his love/connection with Clair would plausibly allow him to not only visit her in dream but subconsciously know when he needed him to visit her. The same would hold true with Brianna. If he was worried about her safety or her future than he could plausibly ‘visit’ her to make sure she was alright.

In short MaryAnn you’re not that far out there. The question is weather Diana made Jamie a soul walker or not. It also raises the question of what Frank saw that night in O. As Frank saw Jamie around two hundred years after his death (give or take a decade I’m not figuring out the exact number thank you.) Frank would naturally call him a ghost.

As to Jamie not recognizing a hair brush you will please recall that Frank had kindly left the ewer empty so Clair was using L’Heure Bleu & poured some onto her hair brush as well. He can’t recognize what he can’t see clearly and then the lights went out.

Though Alix could be right about it being when she is tying up loose ends.

Date:	2006-12-10 19:54
Subject:	Outlander
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired
Music:	Crickets Chirping

Have just started reading a Historical Drama Romance by Diana Gabaldon & I must admit to really enjoying. We have earned our week off between Christmas and New Years at work so I shall be able to relax a little. Am really tired and have been badly misspelling my words so I’ll log off for the night. One last note I have acquired a beautiful weighting tablet to write in and am planning to write in it regularly.

Date:	2006-11-12 18:41
Subject:	Books I have Read
Security:	Public
Mood:	and pained
Music:	Soft Jazz

Alright, this list is in no way complete & is constantly being updated as I remember more books I have read or read more. You will probably also find spelling mistakes; for this I apologize & shall fix them as I can.



C. S. Lewis: The Problem of Pain, The Screwtape Letters, The Great Divorce,
Mere Christanity, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and
the Wordrobe

Tolkin: The Lord of the Rings; The Two Towers; The Return of the King
The Hobbit; The Simmerilian

J.R.Rowling: Harry Potter: Years I-VI

Lund: The Work and the Glory: books I-IX

By Translated by: The Oddisy

By Translated by: The Illide

?: Chant

Robin McKinley: Deerskin

?: The Hardy Boys Series

?: Down Home Ways

?: Natural Beauty

Kahili Gibran: The Prophet

?: The Hundred Dresses

Victoria Holt: The Silk Vendetta; Secret For A Nightinggale; The Black Opal;
Shadow of the Lynx

Jeanne Larsen: Silk Road

Marion Zimer Bradely: Lady of Avalon; The Myst of Avalon

R.D. Blackmore: Lorna Doone

Jane Austen: Masterfield Park; Pride & Prejudice; Since & Sensibility;
Northanger Abbey; Jane Eayre;

Charles Dickens: Oliver Twist; A Christmas Carol; Great Expectations;
The Mystery of Edwin Drood

Roe Kendall: The Scarlet Pimpernel

Walter Jsaacson: Binjamin Franklin: An American Life

Brian Jacques: Red Wall; Mattimeo; Mossflower; Loamhedge; The Long
Patrol(Abrided); Rakkety Tam; Triss; Taggernng

Lemony Snicket: A Series of Unfornite Events I-VI

Defoe: Robinson Crussico

Dale Carnegie: How To Win Friends & Influence People

Washington Irving: Rip Van Winkle & The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

Charlotte Bronte:

:ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASs

Brian Jacques: Stories From RedWall: Redwall, Mattimeo, Mossflower,
Loamhedge, The Long Patrol, Rakkety Tam, Triss, Taggernng

Thomas Pane: Common Sence

?: Churchill on Leadership

Alexander Dumas: The Man in the Iron Mask; The Three Muskatears

Edgar Allan Poe: The Tell-Tale Heart; The Cask of Amotillado; The Masque of the Red
Death; The Raven; Annabel Lee; Facts in the Case of M. Valdemar;
Ulalume; The Black Cat; The Bells; The Pit and the Pendulum; The
Fall of the House of Usher; The Purloined Letter; The Gold Bug

Donald McFarlan: Rob Roy

Anne Rice: Vittorio The Vampire

Michael Crichton: Timeline

Date:	2006-09-16 19:08
Subject:	WeekEnd!
Security:	Public
Mood:	hyper
Music:	R&B

Went Geocaching today & found four around my Aunts house. Taught her & my cousin how to do it and they seemed to enjoy :). On that note it turns out I have been driving past five caches everyday on my way to and from work so I intend to put the data into the GPS & find them one day after work.

Date:	2006-09-14 19:06
Subject:	Quick Log
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired
Music:	Jazz

Well we’ve been having power outages here so just a quick log to say that it’s storming here with expectations of snow in the mountains.

:x

Date:	2006-09-09 15:57
Subject:	Wonderful Day :-)
Security:	Public
Mood:	but Drained
Music:	Honey Suckle Rose

Wow, I have had quiet a day. Was up at about 6:30 this morning & went geo-caching with my youngest sister; am absolutely in love with this *contented sigh*. She made me go yard saling afterwards but it wasn’t that bad. Than we hit the ‘Heritage Day’ fair in the city park for roasted spice nuts and people watching. We visited a little botanical park that I had not realized was there and saw many lovely roses.

There was a booth of home grown honey & honey products that had some of the finest soap I have seen. The quilt exposition was wonderful; there was one that was a simple solid piece of cloth that had been embroidered before quilting. And I purchased a lovely new necklace. It is a quite little frog carved out of a black rock, hung on an adjustable rope and guaranteed not to cause that nasty rash that most metallic jewelry gives me.

After lunch I went to lovely little melodrama ‘D.K. Molar The Devious Dentist’ by the local dram society before getting some home churned ice cream. Sadly they did not use the best of vanilla flavoring but it was still rather good. Being rather worn out I have retired to my flat for re-hydration.

Date:	2006-09-07 19:29
Subject:	Just A Quick Note Before Bed
Security:	Public
Mood:	or getting there
Music:	Jazz

Had ‘employee appreciation day’ at work, got a shirt. They had these really good but greasy breakfast burritos for us but I didn’t take one as I had already eaten before coming.
I’ve been putting in some long days to compensate for the day off on Monday so I’m existed. And sadly the congestion I have been combating is taking the usually root of trying to settle in my chest & give me bronchitis. This means I will have to go back on the expectorant.

Not to wine but I swear I have had to deal with this twice a year since I graduated high school & got it the first time. That was only because I had over reached my self with the AP classes, independent study classes, graduation project, standard required classed & work. I don’t thing I had a decent 8 hour rest once that year.

Maybe if I had not gotten phenomena in grade school…

Date:	2006-09-04 19:21
Subject:	Labor Day Holiday
Security:	Public
Mood:	& Pained
Music:	Silence

Well I have the day off from work which is good as my allergy/poor sinuses thing has kicked in this last week & I have such a headache right now. At least the decongestant is working.

On a better note I went geo-cashing today. Tried for five cashes but only found four. Took about five hours to do them all as they were easy ones but there were a lot of muggles about.
We had a B-B-Q supper & I have an early bed time due to work tomorrow morning.

Good night.

I have not been having the best of days today. I took a new allergy/decongestant this morning and as a result my eyes began having trouble focusing & it felt as if my brain was filled with cotton wool—it was incredibly difficult to think.

I had managed to get to work before the effects kicked in—thank goodness for small favors—and while I’m there I did something incredibly stupid. You see I work at a candy factory & as such have to wash my hands about ten times a day among other sanitary practices. Last week I noticed one of my coworkers—Haily—not fallowing the basic hand washing requirements & had decided to talk to the team lead Kelly about it. But with my mental process impaired, well…I sort of forgot & wrote a note instead which I then placed upon the coworker’s desk. Yah, can you say disaster.

I am now sure Kelly feels that I don’t respect her—which I do—or that I simply refuse to fallow the chain of command—which I don’t.

I know I did talk to her about it after she and Cindy saw it & bluntly told me how I should have handled it; the problem is I don’t remember if I apologized for the unintentional insult or not or most of the conversation for that matter. I don’t know how I should fix this problem yet & may have to ask for advice.

There is one good thing to come out of this; apparently another coworker—Kat—was also not washing her hands though she was sanitizing them. So we all got a reminder of hand washing requirements which can not be a bad thing in this line of work.

Sufficed to say that as soon as the medicine started wearing off & I could think clearly I realized what I had done on my own & have been feeling guilty about it ever since. I also noticed that my brain began working at an accelerated rate & can not but wonder if this is what speed dose to one, I don’t plan on finding out though.

Date:	2006-07-24 20:06
Subject:	Family Reunion
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired

We had our family reunion campout over the past week (19-22). Was alright if you don’t count the two downpours. We found our first Geo-Cache at Moon Lake while we were up there. Am still rather tired so I’ll log off now.

Date:	2005-11-28 09:48
Subject:	Back to Work I Go.
Security:	Public
Mood:	drained

My adorable nice Nichole – around 4 years old – came to visit us today and brought me a belated birthday gift; a newfangled charm bracelet and a pewter jewel-box set. It was good to see her.

Date:	2005-11-26 09:36
Subject:	It's My Birthday!
Security:	Public
Mood:	bouncy
Music:	Enya

It’s my Birthday!

Today I am twenty-four years old, wow. I had to figure that out as I honestly could not remember how old I was to begin with. I have gotten myself a lovely solitaire pendent/earrings set in silver (hypoallergenic of course as I wish to wear them) with my birthstone, warm slipper boots and a new top.

I think my younger brother Nathan is finally growing up for he gave me a wonderfully thoughtful gift. He knows of my interest in Hebrew and acquired a prayer for me. On one half of the page it is in English and on the other in Hebrew. He then went to a thrift store and purchased a frame, mounted it himself and gave it to me.

There is a big family supper tonight while all the cousins are in town, just for kicks. It will be at Aunt Kristy’s house so I will be going down to Payson later. I also have a new x-stick to start; it is the cutest little duck. I think I will give it to Krystal who is carrying her second child; maybe I can put the duck on a few other baby things as well.

Date:	2005-11-24 09:55
Subject:	Happy Thanksgiving!
Security:	Public
Mood:	amused

Happy Thanksgiving!

We are going to Aunt Kristy’s house in Payson – about one hour south of my home – for the feast today. Nice Nicole stayed over night with us as her mother works today and she needed somewhere to spend the holiday. I woke her up to watch the ‘Macy’s Day’ parade this morning and she is excited to see Grand Mother Karren again. This year we are responsible for bringing only a few things to the dinner including my homemade cranberry sauce and a can of store bought jelly. I am so glad to have the remainder of this week off from work.

Date:	2005-07-24 12:25
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	but happy
Music:	Classical Mix

I have had a busied month. My Grandparents have purchased a home in Vernal, UT. that needed to be re-habbed lest they loose eleven thousand dollars they were forced to put in an escrow account by the Fanny May Co. The thing is they only had 30 day in which to make the nine required repairs as well as the repairs that they felt the home needed. Because of this I have been visiting them on every spare weekend and my two week vacation time to help them with it, and we only just meat the deadline.

I am tired, injured and feel ill at the thought of any more service projects to say the least. On top of that I have been asked to make a newsletter of my Ward (religious services) and have not really had enough time to do it. Thank goodness I have until the first Sunday in August to have it out.

To top it all off my younger sister decided to adopt out her son – my only nephew – and didn’t even give us enough notice to say good by to him. Thought he is only six months old it would have been nice to have the option of doing so. Thought considering whom my sister is it may be a good thing that she put him up for adoption.

The only highlight of the month has been the publishing to JRR’s sixth book in the Harry Potter series ‘The Half Blood Prince’ (HBP). I read it in twelve hours or less and enjoyed it immensely.

I have a meeting to go to now so I will try to write again latter or tomorrow morning.

Date:	2005-05-20 11:11
Subject:	Miscellaneous
Security:	Public
Mood:	groggy
Music:	Random Raido

I saw Star Wars III at the local theater. We had tickets for the 18th of May 11:59 showing but due to technical difficulties it didn’t start until just before 1 am. This is a tradition for me and my two younger brothers who I have taken to the first midnight showing of the last two as well. And while the show was quite good it is sadly nothing to rave about. It filled in a lot of answers—why Darth Vader is in that suit, who raised Laya, what happened to the Jedi ect.—and Yoda fought again but it wasn’t phenomenal or anything.

My nephew—who is now three and a half to four months old—has now been put on oxygen and an oxygen saturation monitor on top of the apnea monitor he has been on since birth. This seems to have helped as he no longer turns dusky or blue unless he is taken off the oxygen that is. I pray he will improve.

Life goes on and I half to go finish cleaning the house now.

Date:	2005-05-05 21:31
Subject:	Dreams
Security:	Public
Mood:	and slightly confused
Music:	Instrimental Classical Mix

Dreams are fickle things. Over the years I have learned a great deal about them; everything form what the symbolism within them means to how to make it so that you member them.

I started my reasurch at the tender age of twelve when I was given a school asinment of writhing down one of my dreams for creative writing in English. The Professor said he would not accept the “I don’t remember my dreams” line and that everyone had to turn something in. I ended up having to start the paper with exactly that in quotations and make something up in the way of creative writing—he passes me simply for effort. The fact that I also was able to show him my first book on dreaming—luckily it included an exercise to increase ones ability to remember dreams—and my newly purchased dream journal also helped.

As I began to remember my dreams I discovered that in truth I only have about fifteen dreams that repeat over and over and more over they were shockingly realistic. No flying or such for me only mum, dad the siblings and friends/classmates going about our every day life. There was rarely anything to give away the fact that I was dreaming.

And then I had a startling recollection—as a child I could always remember my dreams. I would often become confused as to weather or not I was dreaming at the moment as I could never quite tell. Sometime before my eleventh year I even asked mum if I was awake or not.

It was only recently that I began having spontaneous off the wall dreams in which you wonder weather or not you have gone mad before you wake up. I have also begun to recall some such dreams from my childhood-a particularly disturbing one of Lady A Lane from Mr. Rodgers still make me shudder and explains why I suddenly went off the show rather young.

I can now proudly clime to be capable of lucid dreaming—this is where you recognize that you are in a dream state and can control the world you mind has created. I also know who to set my subconsus mind to work on problems I’m having whilst I sleep so that I will awake with an answer presented to me. I have even had prophetic dreams that would latter occur in real life-though usually only small parts and rarely as a whole.

Yet two night ago I had a most unusual and fascinating dream. I was at University. The building was very much like the one I currently attend and yet different. To make a long story short I for some reason was spending a lot of time in one loo or another and was being stocked by an Asian fellow. In my last attempt at evading him I was all but sprinting up the stairs and down the halls when out of the corner of my eye I saw the most enchanting man.

He had light brown hair with a short beard that accented his square jaw and eyes that gave the impression of unconditional acceptance. The moment his eyes fell on me he smiled so warmly I almost melted. He spoke to me and I fear my startled dear caught in the headlights response was viewed as a negative response on my part. He looked so sad as he headed to his class that my heart was still panging when I woke up a few minutes latter.

This is the firs time I can recall feeling emotions within a dream other than bewilderment and shock. There was fear of the stacker, the pang of having inadvertently hurting that man and the strong nearly dispread desire to find him again and beg his pardon and protection. From the moment he walked away I just knew that he was the only one who would be able to protect me.

How drab I sound and yet even now, two days latter, it has not faded. Nor has his face become as blurred as it should have. I console my self by saying it was only a dream and yet I cannot shake it. It is also responsible for the most detailed entry into my dream journal ever.

Date:	2005-04-06 11:13
Subject:	Who Are Your Favorite Literary Charters?
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper
Music:	Acid Rock Mix

Who are my favorite literary charters and what books they are from. Well I tend to enjoy the more complex charters, there is usually one in every book thought not always. A good example is the S. Snape charter in the Harry Potter series by JRR, Golum in Lord of the Rings and Iago in Shakespeare Othelo.

I know there is this occult fallowing of women who like to fantasize about Snape and the actor who plays him in a sexual manner; and while I can see the appeal it is not the reason behind my own enjoyment of him. Where they dream of getting him into bed I would prefer to have him on the couch (a term that is common for those who attend, practice or are interested in the physclogy field). First off we as readers must understand that we are seeing every charter and situation through the eyes of Harry–the stories mane charter–eyes and it is there for shaded with his own ideas, feelings and preadjust.

With that in mind he is the series ignima, a dark brooding and apparently cruel man with a dark dangerous past who–according to book 5–my come from an abusive home environment yet at the same time he is a spy and gather of information for the side of lite. He hates the series main charters, Potter and his friends, yet is continually trying to pound life saving information into there heads as well as putting himself in harms way to protect them. Even in POA (book _) when they have blaently broken the rules and even attacked him he goes about reassuring Minister Fudge that they were obviously under the influence of a cures or hex and should not be punished by the public legal system.

Iago is similar and yet completely different. Throughout the story he is continually debating with, and justifying to the audience and himself that what he is doing is acceptable. The same is done with Golum. Both are wonderful to read and I do hope that the series by JRR will do the same with the Snape charter.

Those are the three that I can think of off the top of my head at the moment, and I am surprised to realize that they are all male. I just thought of that the Lady in The Three Musketeers (I do not own this book and cannot run and look up her name to ensure the spelling) would probably fit this description as well, though it is harder as women are not often written in this form.

That’s my spill for the day. Abysinnia!

Date:	2005-04-04 18:04
Subject:	Current Reading
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative
Music:	I Robot sound track

I’m going to have to get use to logging into this on a daily basses. I am still having problems figuring out how to update this thing, advice/instruction is welcome.

I am currently reading two books for recreation the first is called CHANT by Katharine Le Meé. Based on the CD that was released in the US in 1994, it is about the history and theories behind Gregorian Chant and is extremely fascinating. The second is STONEHENGE REVEALED by David Souden and has some interesting theories on the origins of those monuments that dot the Salisbury plain.

I have decided to create a list of all the books I have read in the past ten years–or at least all that I can remember–and will probily be posting it hear–just for kicks–until I have my website up and running smoothly.

Have to go now, other things to do.

Date:	2005-03-28 15:15
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	satisfied

I thought this poem would be appropriate for a first entry. I have started this journal out of a class assignment and will announce now that I have sad spelling skills. Will hopefully learn how to better use this site soon.

The Journal

One day I received a book
“Journal” was on the front
I received it from my Mother dear
who said I was all grown up.

The cover was red as a rose
the lettering all of gold
the paper white withe small black lines
on which I was to write.

But what to write I did not know
I tried so many things
a daily log, and just my thoughts
a letter to a friend,
poetry, and short stories
but I could not get it write.

So now it sits upon my shelf
and waits patiently
for me to write the words
of my day and my plains
or how awful things can be.

Now it is not alone
there are others by its side
from friends, teachers, and relatives
and all are blank inside.

Angela Davis